Every year we alternate which family reunion we go to.  This year the Griswold Elkins side won the priviledge of our presence as we joined them in northern Michigan for a long weekend of fun in the sun and the occasional dog fight.  The  night before we left, Wixi and I were cuddling and he whispered, “Mom, I think I could just about fly there.”  The kids were shaking with excitement by the time we got there and turned them loose with their cousins, who got busy throwing them off the launch pad.

Launch Pod

For some reason, we all feel it necessary to bring our dogs.  All of them.  If one of them wasn’t lost, another one was.  But Comet stole the show, hands down.

Comet Dog

Our own Parker dog is 12 years old this year, but kept up with Comet no problem….

Parker

Everyone around us was laughing because the kids would yell Whoa!  Wow!!  Oohhh!  At every. single. burst.  Even the practice rounds were acknowledged by our cutie pies.  Memories they’ll never forget.  Me either.

Fireworks

Because of some break-ins in our neighborhood recently, we decided to have a security system installed.  This decision seemed simple enough.  Only, nothing is ever simple.

Since we haven’t had a land-line at our house since roughly 2004, we decided to have one installed.  Otherwise, we’d have to pay a huge fee upfront to ADT, ( along with a monthly charge) for them to monitor the system through our cell phones.  I called AT&T to inquire, and within five minutes I had agreed to one of their bundles that includes cable, internet and phone service.  Tim had actually been looking in to U-verse for awhile but had never closed the deal, so I thought I was doing him a favor.   And I was.  Because hanging out with the cable guy for 7.5 hours is what you call Building Character.

After 2 hours, we figured out that the phone service being installed was VOIP (voice over IP) and not a traditional POTS line.  Do you want to know what POTS stands for?  Are you sure?…because it’s so technical it might blow your mind.  It stands for Plain Old Telephone Service.  I have a degree in Telecommunication, so that’s how I know.  Worth every penny.  So, even though I told the sales woman on the phone that I didn’t want VOIP, because POTS works best with the security system, she apparently signed us up for VOIP anyway.

Thus began a 2 hour quest to get AT&T to comprehend that they are a phone company and ought to be able to install a standard phone line.  They finally agreed to get right on that – next Monday.  Maybe.  If everything goes well.  Did you know that’s why service operators wear head sets?  Yeah, so they can cross their fingers for you.

So we said to the cable guy, forget the phone service – just do not leave here until the TV and internet are working.  Do not.  He promised he wouldn’t, and got to work.  Soon after getting started, he wanted to know why we hadn’t ordered HD service for the gigantic HD television in the middle of our tiny living room.  I bet you can guess that we actually had ordered HD, but I’ll spare you the ridiculousness of the ensuing scene.

Tim’s mom was watching the kids for us and decided she’d had enough.  She popped some popcorn, stuffed it in her purse, and took the kids to see a movie.

The cable guy finally left at about 6:30pm and I found myself missing him.  He’d become part of the family in a way – tripping over the dog and remembering to close the back gate so she wouldn’t escape.  I only hope that when we make another rash decision that snowballs into a comedy of errors and forces us to spend a ridiculous amount of time with a stranger in our home, that that stranger is a lot like him.

I finished Max’s Race yesterday with a time of 36:56.  Did you catch that?  I FINISHED the race.  I’m so happy and sore I don’t know what to do with myself.

Max was a little boy in our community who died in 2005 and his parents started a foundation in his name.  He happened to go to the same daycare as our kids, but we didn’t know him or his family.  I’m happy that I chose this race to begin what I hope will be a long and fulfilling hobby.

For a couple of days before the race, I had been trying to get hydrated, eat well and avoid alcohol.  To celebrate my discipline, Tim took me to the Peanut Barrel for a pitcher of Blue Moon on Friday night.  While there, my friend Nikki called to plan our meeting spot the next morning.  When I couldn’t hear her over the noise of the bar, she had the nerve to question whether I was taking the race seriously enough.  Duh, I chose the beer that has orange slices in it.

The Race

I made it two miles before I had to walk a bit.  I wasn’t all that tired yet, but I was afraid if I didn’t conserve a little energy I might not be able to make it all the way.  I walked a minute or two and then started up again.  After another half mile or so, I had an overwhelming urge to start crying my eyes out.   Then, just as quickly, I began to laugh.

I hadn’t anticipated this.  My body wasn’t a wreck – my mind was.  “Listen, you lunatic, this isn’t a marathon – it’s THREE miles,” I scolded myself.  I tried to concentrate on my breathing.  With every breath in: keep it together.  Every breath out: keep it together.  I had one last corner to turn up ahead.  Once I made that turn, I’d be able to see the finish line and hundreds of people would be cheering for me, willing  me to succeed.

For a long while I’d been following a woman to seemed to be out on her version of a leisurely Sunday drive.  She had been cheerfully thanking each volunteer as we passed them – each holding a cardboard arrow pointing us in the right direction.  How could they have known that since mile three I’d been considering vearing off course to the Dairy Store just a short block away?  Had this happened before?  Had they had runners disappear off course, like Amelia Earhart, never to be seen again?  Their arrows seemed to suggest it.

Anyway, this woman.  She was cheerful.  And friendly.  And talkative.  And annoying.  At the last bend, we came upon a volunteer standing with an arrow in one hand, and a leash in the other.  Of course, This Woman had to comment on what a great dog he was, just sitting there patiently as we all ran by.  “Oh,” said the young volunteer.  “This was Max’s dog.”

Suddenly, I felt like I was running in my tall rubber wellies.  My feet were heavy and my chest was heaving with the weight of my body.  The slobbery, thick-in-the-middle, beautiful chocolate lab, was Max’s dog.  He had run with that dog.  He had cuddled that dog.  He had to say goodbye to that dog. My breathing became irratic, and as I rounded the final corner, I had to decide how I was going to finish this race.  With determination and grace, or as blubbering baby, crawling across the line.  I guess I probably was a little of both.  I worked hard to get my breathing back on track and I was even able to put on a little burst of speed at the end.  No one could tell the tears from the sweat.  It was only 3.2 miles for my body, but it was a full blown marathon in my mind.

Yesterday I signed up for a 5k race. I’ve been running regularly since January, but feel like I’ve made minimal progress. The race is less than a month away, so I don’t have much time for improvement, but at least now there is something to shoot for.

There was a time when you couldn’t have paid me to run 10 steps (I never liked to sweat!) so I guess I should be proud of this little breakthrough.

Wish me luck – and let me know if you have any advice for a complete newbie.

The other night we watched a replay of the 2008 Scripps National Spelling Bee, and I fell in love with this kid. He was mortified when he thought he had to spell “numbnut” on national television (the word was actually “numnah”).

Unfortunately, this little gaffe reminded me of my own miserable experience in a 5th grade spelling bee when I was foiled by the word EMBARRASSED. Oh, the irony. To this day, I pronounce it: emBARE-ASSed, lest I forget the second s. The kid in this video went on to win last year. I can’t wait for the 2009 National Spelling Bee – it’s on tonight!  Catch it on ABC at 8pm eastern.

more about “Numb What? Scripps Spelling Bee“, posted with vodpod

This is an amazing story that I saw on TED a long time ago and I’ve since been repeating it to everyone I know. It just occurred to me that I could also post it here. DUH! If you are at all interested in how your brain works, watch this. If you’re not…uh…ok then.

more about “Jill Bolte Taylor TED Talk“, posted with vodpod

It was not love at first sight for me.  When SpongeBob SquarePants started on Nickelodeon ten years ago, I did not have kids, but I swore that if I did, my children would never watch it.  Never EVER.  Why a Sponge?  I thought.  Why does his laugh need to be so obnoxious?  Why does he live in a pineapple? Under the sea? I had no time for such ridiculousness.

Like a lot of my pre-parenthood declarations (no fast food!), this one turned out to be just a tad bit unrealistic.  Somehow my tolerance for the obnoxious and the ridiculous has grown in direct correlation with the age of my kids.  So now I find myself not only watching SpongeBob, but loving him for his sillyness, perpetual optimism and insane work ethic.  I actually use the show to talk to my kids about always looking for the bright side of things – and they say Mom, Patrick just ate his own boogar!  You can’t win ‘em all, you know.

If you love the residents of Bikini Bottom, leave a comment telling me why (or, if you don’t, why not).

Then check out this video from NPR….

Tim and I both grew up watching tons of tv.  As a result, we can recite 30 year-old commercials, but can’t remember the date of our Anniversary.  We’re okay with that, but somehow want better for our kids (poor things).  Our parents didn’t have to do much to regulate our viewing because we only had about 6 channels to choose from.  Today, kids have about 600 channels to choose from, and the level of content they can stumble upon ranges from harmless and boring to nightmare-inducing gore, violence and sex.  And those are just the commercials.  If you’ve come across this problem yourself, and find yourself shuffling around muttering about the good old days, here are three ways you can start to tame TV-time in your house.

Get a Grip
Chances are, your kids are watching more screens than just the TV.  It’s important to get a grip on just how much time they’re spending on the computer, with video games, texting, etc.  This will help you figure out how much time they should realistically spend on each, and still have time for TV.  And sleep.  Time to sleep is good.  And play.  They’ve got to have time for some unstructured play, right?  I know you don’t want to know how much time they spend doing this stuff.  Just like you don’t want to look at your bank account – you know it’s bad.  But you can’t make adjustments until you know what you’re dealing with. 

Help Kids Choose What to Watch
Gone are the days when you were held captive by some TV executive’s decision about what you’ll watch and when.  You can be your own TV programmer with a little help from the DVR (digital video recorder) if you have one.  If you don’t, and can afford to get one, I highly recommend it.  You’ll enjoy it for the ability to pause live action, or rewind immediately if you happen to miss a wardrobe malfunction.  But more importantly, you can talk to your kids about which kinds of shows are appropriate to watch, and set up a recording together.  Even if you don’t use a DVR or a VCR to record, you can still talk about what’s on and choose what to watch together.

Watch WITH Your Kids
I know you’re busy, but if you can spare even 10 minutes to sit down and watch one of your kid’s favorite shows with them – do it.  Do it, and ask questions.  This is not like watching football with your husband.  Your kids will not grunt at you or roll their eyes (ok,  they probably will roll their eyes).  If they’re toddlers, they will love you for taking an interest.  If they’re tweens, they’ll act mortified but secretly love you for taking an interest.  The important thing is you may discover a new opportunity to connect with your kid.  Think of the topics that are bound to come up, that you’d love to talk to them more about: sharing, fighting, gossiping, lying, making choices, sibling issues, things being fair or unfair, why it’s important to brush your teeth or wear deoderant or admit that deep down you really  like the Jonas Brothers (okay I admit it).  You get the idea.  Talk it up!

Perhaps you’ve heard of the TLC show, Jon and Kate Plus 8?  If not, perhaps I could come and live with you – your life sounds lovely.

Jon and Kate Plus 8 is a reality show, based on a family with two sets of mutliples – sextuplets and twins.  Mimi is obsessed with this show and can’t understand why I don’t want to sit with her and watch an entire Saturday marathon of episodes (hint: it has something to do with all the screaming, crying and whining).  I can take it in small doses though (the kids are kinda cute), so the other morning we were watching and suddenly Jon says he has a little work to do before he can go outside with the kids.  They show him going over to the computer and pulling up the website for Allstate Insurance.  Throughout this sequence, his voiceover is saying something about how his Allstate Agent wanted him to check some things out on the website.  The Allstate website.  Where you can get all kinds of helpful information about Allstate insurance for times when you need insurance for some stuff.  Allstate.

I was laughing to myself about what a lame attempt at product placement that was when Mimi says, “Hey, mom, do we have an Allstate agent?”  I’m glad she spoke up because I would have let the moment pass without pointing out how products are imbedded into programming all the time.  We had a little discussion about whether Jon really needed to “do some work,” or if he was just trying to call attention to a company that is likely paying money to get him to do so.  We came up with a few other more obvious instances (judges drink Coke on American Idol) and she decided it’s a fun game – sniffing out the product placement.

For now she’s looking mostly at visual images – we didn’t get into how entire scripts are written around products, because cynisism is unbecoming in a seven-year-old.

Last Friday I gave a presentation in front of about 30 people.  I generally make it a habit to not prepare for presentations like these.  I’ve always believed that I’m at my best when I just wing it.  Completely illogical, but oh-so-convenient.  This time, I decided to inconvenience myself and actually prepare what I wanted to say.  I put together a little powerpoint presentation and outlined some important points on a scrap piece of paper.  When I got the the hotel, I practiced my talk out loud in my room and even went to bed early.  The result?

I sucked.  Not completely, and not spectacularly, but I sucked nonetheless.  It wasn’t that I didn’t know my stuff or that I wasn’t excited about talking about it, it was that I felt extreme pressure for having practiced in the first place.    Normally I can say to myself, oh well, that was pretty good for winging it.  This time, no such luck.

One good thing is now that I’ve actually tried to do well, and didn’t succeed to the point I had hoped, I’m determined to do better.  While I was prepping for my talk, I found a really cool site called Presentation Zen, written by Garr Reynolds.  He’s got a lot of really good content, including presentation tips broken out under:

Organization and Prep Tips
Delivery Tips
Slide Tips

It’s too late for me this time, but you can be sure I’ll use these tips for my next presentation.